not often ; rarely ;D

Too Smitten For Words

2012-01-28T02:29:00.002Z

Dear Mental,

Tonight was the night that I poured my heart out to my friend about how much I like this guy in school.

So, as I unfold more stories and moments about him, the more I realise and also my friend pointed out that, I really like him THAT MUCH.

I don't know if it's a mental obsession or I really do have feelings for him.

However, I'm pretty sure I am really into him purely based on his personality, looks & etc.

Not because I am an obsessed stalker -__-

I have never had feelings for a dude until it can make me go as insane as ever!

I tried getting over him, but all the little things that reminds me of him, or things that he say or do, it will always put a smile on smile face and just makes me happy.

Having him around, makes me feel happy. I guess, that is what I want from him if he was my boyfriend.

He will always be there to make me happy. That's pretty much what I need right now.

I know I have my best friends but, it wouldn't to hurt to have a best friend and a boyfriend as one package right?

Although, based on my current Semester 1 results, I'm not so sure if he would even be interested in me -_-

Hmm, insyaallah he'll be fine with me. I'm still hoping.

Hopefully, things between me & him will have some progress. At the rate we're going, so far everything's going smoothly. I think.

tabye

♥

Feeling The Independence

2012-01-17T01:52:00.001Z

All Time Low, We Are The In Crowd & The Maine

18 DAYS

♥

Feeling The Independence

2012-01-17T01:50:00.001Z

FutureProof , Chloe Swaby, Dive Bella Dive & The Debut

4 DAYS

♥

Semester 2 :)

2012-01-17T01:44:00.002Z

Dear Mental,

Just needed to remind myself that this is the new timetable for Semester 2:

Monday:

9am-12pm = Design Explorations

Tuesday:

9am-12pm = Architectural Planning & Design Studio

Wednesday:

1pm-4pm = Introduction Into Technology & Design

Thursday:

5pm-8pm = Transferable Skills For The Built Environment

done!

tabye

♥

Young Hearts Being Torn

2012-01-17T01:32:00.004Z

He's been on my mind.

He is the reason why I might be suffering from a first degree or maybe second degree insanity.

It's like this emotional instability is controlling my whole sense of right and wrong.

It's as if I don't know what choices I should make on the subject of love.

I don't blame him.

I blame myself.

Why do I have such a weak heart.

The heart of a naive girl who might be stinking of desperation just because she's never had that special guy in her 18 years of living.

They said youth is the time to discover, but I don't seem to be discovering anything.

Like in Greek, "I left black & white back in high school , but from here on out, it's all shades of grey."

Nothing is the same, the systems are different. Even rules are literally disobeyed. Things now happen for a reason and not because they HAVE to happen.

It's happening to me now, I am sadly just stuck at a road block or dead end.

Waiting for someone to pick me up and show me the right way to end this endless emotional war of mine.

Maybe I need to think more about it.

tabye

♥

My Morning Heart Beats

2012-01-15T09:44:00.002Z

Dear Mental,

It's a lovely Sunday morning. *cue Maroon 5* :)

Sunny 3degrees in Chelmsford today.

I was thinking that maybe I should start off the morning by blogging so that I will continue on with something more productive throughout the day.

Insyaallah things will go according to plan.

Nothing much going on today. Haha, just maybe might pop into the gym. I need to do one session without Simon.

Currently listening to One Direction. Haha, Sadly I am a sucker for pop songs, so sue me eh?

Honestly, The Wanted are more awesome! SORRY :)

Okay, moving on, sidetracking, so Friday is the weigh in ! Worried like shizz now, oh god. Hopefully I lost some weight, :(

On lighter note, yet still nerve-wracking, uni is starting in 8 DAYS, I am a tad bit worried about results.

Insyaallah I did well. I mean, I tried and did my best already, so hopefully my results will be just fine :B

Another thing to be kinda happy about is that I will be going to London next weekend before Sem 2 kicks off!

That's for meeting the family, friends, visit the Royal Academy & watching FutureProof w/ Dive Bella Dive, The Debut & Chloe Swaby live in Camden Barfly.

It was the same venue where I met Forever Is Over , JMA, WSP and Find Me Next Fall :)

Excited, can't wait to take a pic with the FP boys :') ♥

Okay, then, I guess that's enough of my morning blog fix, shall go fix myself some brekkie before I starve myself -_- HAHA.

tabye

♥

8 Years and Counting...

2012-01-09T23:28:00.005Z

Dear Mental,

I had the best skype session with my long-time best friend,

Mahirah Farhana on Sunday.

It was 12am Monday night for her and 4pm Sunday evening for me.

Petaling Jaya - Chelmsford.

She's on holiday, I'm on holiday :)

What a nice time to skype with someone you love.

4 hours makes 8 years look so easy :')

♥

best friends forever & ever, till we die together.

Oh the memories of Freshmen year in SA.

tabye

♥

Happy Birthday To...?

2012-01-08T02:18:00.004Z

Alexandra Jane Handoko,

a.k.a AJ

Happy 19th friend :) Sorry I was unable to attend your dinner party in Manchester. :( I am so sorry again for the last minute cancellation.

Nevertheless, I hope you had fun with the others!

It's great that we're still friends even though we're in different unis. Hopefully, I'll see you in Manchester sometime soon!

I hope you'll like this double insulated mug for your daily dose of coffee/tea ;) Or maybe even hot chocolate!

I will be posting it to Manchester ASAP! :)

Hopefully we'll keep in touch and stay friends throughout uni and so on :)

Picture kudos to AJ's camera!

Taken during Bellerbys Graduation 2011 !

tabye

♥

Endings and Beginnings

2012-01-07T21:18:00.004Z

Dear Mental,

Happy 2012! I know I've been absent for the last 2 months of 2011. This was due to my very hectic Semester One timetable and Christmas break.

Apologies! Hopefully this year will be more consistent okay? :)

Basically, this is just my short but sweet KUDOS/THANK YOU post to those who made 2011 an amazing and unforgettable year for me :)

1) Family: Mum, dad, sis, cousins, aunties, uncles and etc; Thank you for being there in supporting me when I had to leave for college and uni. It meant the world to me. Your endless support and love is unimaginable!

2) Best friends,friends: You guys know who you are :) Thanks a bunch for keeping in touch with me even though you guys saw me coming home for only twice a year last year! I owe a lot time to spend with each and every one of you ! Forever keep in touch okay?

3) College mates: My Bellerbys people :) Haha, from college mates, we all became friends, right from the first day of college! Thanks for the unforgettable 8 months, I'll forever cherish those moments we had. Hope everyone's doing well in their respective unis now. Stay friends!

4) College teachers: Thanks for the support and advice :) Because of you, I learnt a lot in college!

5) Uni classmates: Hello my 3 months and counting buddies, :) Hopefully the next 2 years and a half will make us closer ! You guys are awesome already ;) Stay the same!

6) Uni lecturers: Thank you for the advice and guidance for last semester! I will be seeing most of you next sem again :) Excited! Although, still worried about my results :S Insyaallah I did fine.

Happy New Year and may 2012 will be better :)

tabye

♥

I Am That Kinda Girl, Just So You Know

2011-10-26T20:11:00.006+01:00

Dear Mental,

These past few days have been really exhausting for me.

Some things might be falling into place like it should be.

However, there are just some things that I want to progress faster and sooner.

I just wanna have that feeling you know?

That important feeling.

I know, I know, I am way in over my head.

I keep on reminding myself that, life is not a movie that you can just make stuff up and expect every single damn thing to go your own way.

I mean, if life was like that, there won't be any challenges wouldn't it?

See what I mean? I just contradicted myself.

At one point I am some over melodramatic angst-y teenager who just wishes that life was much easier and that everything would just fall into my lap whenever I wished for it to come true.

However, at some other random point, I am this mature 18 year old uni student who feels that everything is only the beginning and that there's more to life than just shitty dramas and last minute homework.

Giving myself a push of confidence is hard enough, but to go for an unexpected emotional plunge is just another crazy thing.

SIGHS. I feel like Sheldon Cooper. It is hell in my head at times.

I've discovered my passion, I know the do's and don'ts of being a student, so what else do I need?

I might be suffering from some emotionally chronic mental disturbance -_-

Apologies for the deep and brutally honest writings of my life for now.

I guess I just need to figure out why I feel so uneasy now.

tabye

♥

Making Time For Everything

2011-10-26T01:05:00.003+01:00

Dear Mental,

I was at the library today for 3hrs straight? Nah, last Saturday was worse. It was 5hrs. So yeah. I think some of you might have read my previous post on how I have been hibernating in the uni library for the past couple of days.

Uh huh. It's true! Ain't that just a shock to your systems? HAHA.

Sense the sarcasm there?

Pretty much. I've been pretty crabby too. Monthly needs. As per usual, a girl's gotta be a bit mean you know.

Speaking of mean, at last my constant spamming of emails to my lecturer has got me my reward/fine ! HAHA

Irony's a bitch - Rusty Cartwright :)

Thanks Jacob Zachar :) You played Rusty perfectly! I miss Greek.

Okay! Sidetracking much and damn distracted! I am suppose to be reading my history reading on High Renaissance for tomorrow's presentation! -_____-

My life is so full of words and images.

LOL, wait everybody's life is like that! HAHAHA.

Ignore me. :) Sleepy time. Need to read History and get ready for tomorrow's long day!

p/s: Thank you David B for sharing your M&M's with me in the library :) It woke me up!

tabye

♥

A Little Too Early For Hibernation Isn't It?

2011-10-23T00:10:00.003+01:00

Dear Mental,

Have you ever felt like you just wanna go away somewhere very far away and just not listen to anyone for a bit? I guess I have been feeling a little irritated by everyone lately! GOSH How mean of me huh? :( I just feel like I really need some alone time from everyone. All the stress of uni is finally getting into my head! My sister told me that my mum cried when I told her about how stress I was with the course :/ That just made me feel worse! :( I am so sorry everyone. I am sorry friends. I know I have been cutting contact with you guys. I basically have been hibernating in the library. I actually spent 5hrs straight in the library today! WOW. That's a new record for me. The most was 2-3hrs. But today was, wow. Even Lewis told me to chillax and go eat ! Oh well, need to get ready for bed and I need to clean up my messed up room before Kak Didi and her aunty comes tomorrow!

So, goodnight bloggers.

Keep in touch.

tabye

♥

Why Not Just Grant Me A Wish?

2011-10-16T01:30:00.004+01:00

Hey you.

You kinda just make me feel like I wanna strangle you or maybe just myself for that matter.

I know you mean well, but sometimes I feel like all those efforts are just a waste of your time.

Surprisingly, you still bother about me even life is going pretty well according to plan for you.

Oh gosh, I just wish there was a sign that said, 'YOU DON'T NEED ME IF YOU DON'T WANT TO!'

Sometimes I just wonder, maybe my mum is right about this thing about me.

Maybe I am naive enough to even bother about you.

Nevertheless, I am the one who tries to learn to not judge people ever since high school.

Somehow, I had to learn it the hard way.

I hope, maybe you can stop all these charades and just come clean with whatever you're keeping from me.

Apologies if I am too young to understand whatever that you're trying to go through, but you yourself said that you trusted me.

I hope it's still there.

If not, I'm sorry for you.

Goodbye, may the next encounter will be a successful one.

tabye

♥

300th Post & Counting..

2011-10-04T18:50:00.005+01:00

Dear Mental,

I am so sorry for not being able to update lately! However uni life has gotten way better ever since orientation started! Especially last week :)

Let's start with Sunday, 9 October 2011:

Nothing much happened! HAHA :) But yeah, basically I just slept in, been a bit under the weather because I fell sick the week before and also the fact that my parents went back to Malaysia.

Monday, 10 October 2011:

Well, I had tutorial in the afternoon, so pretty much it was a free day :D WHEE! Although, I had a meeting with Joshua and Nikhil for the group presentation for the ILSC class !

Tuesday, 11 October 2011:

Pin-up day for the Cathedral sketches! NERVE-WRACKING as per usual! HAHA. But yeah, during class we had to 'dissect' a bell pepper ! TEEHEE. ;) SO FUN! Somehow, Kyle has a very weird obsession with the bell pepper smell :P HAHAHA. Sitting with the boys were so fun! OHH and Billy was lucky enough to get his sketch chosen to be shown to everyone in class! (Y) Go Billy :D During lunch we ate at the benches outside Marconi and, me, Nadir & Kyle talked about Pixar animations! HAHA, especially How To Train Your Dragon & Wall-E! In the afternoon, me, Nadir, David and Bradley had our discussion about our presentation at the library! It was fun too! :) Talked about leftover spaghetti, holidays, A Levels, countries, names, French terms, baguettes, berets, croissants, foreign languages and chewing gum. NICE.

Wednesday, 12 October 2011:

WEDNESDAY! Presentation day! Freaking out like shizz. YEAH. So basically we did pretty well surprisingly! Well, the boys did awesome-ly! I almost PASSED OUT, like literally! :O OMG. HAHAHA. But Kyle and Joshua said I was fine! HAHA, thanks guys :') David took ages for his section though, HEHE. But he's AWESOME like that, go David :3 Bradley at last pass pronouncing his French terms ^_^ HEHE, so no baguettes to be thrown at that boy for awhile :P Nadir did his intro smoothly! WOOHOO. Not only that, because of me, CONCRETE has been a subject that made all of us CRAZY! -______- AHAHAHHAHA especially me! History took a whole interesting turn when me, Kyle, David, Bradley, Nadir, Ross, Shaun & Billy talked about Roman robes, concrete, cement, socks being worn with slippers/sandals and childhood memories. HAHA, we had tons of fun. Well, before lunch, me and David had our 'commotion' at the Resource Cafe! HAHA, because David didn't want to take the chicken wrap that he likes because I took it first .___. I FELT SO BAD! I literally FORCE him to take it! HAHAHA, but in the end he did! SO YAY, :) However he said that I am STUBBORN because I didn't want to take the wrap -_____- MEH, you'll pay David Morgan! BAHAHAHA. Oh not only that, my Viennese Whirls came only as one biscuit in the packet which should have 2 of them ! Zzzz. What a rip off! So I only paid it for 25p :P HEHE. YAY. Saved money! Tech & Design, was of course, on concrete -_____- HEHE. It was a densed lecture, too much CONCRETE! HAHAHA, so Billy fell asleep ! Then during tutorial, more concrete, HAHA. Everything was just a blur to me.

Thursday, 13 October 2011:

WOKE UP LATE. GAH. But had Archifunk meeting! Met up with Sam, the ex-pres and we talked about the committee members, so Dean is our new pres, Kyle is the treasurer and I am the secretary! HAHA, :D Awesome! So yeah. Pretty much I am quite excited to promote Archifunk, although people don't seem to be too keen on it -______- SIGHS. Kyle posted a picture of Betzy the concrete on my Wall! OMG, HAHAHAHHA. But she's kinda cute, surprisingly :P HEHE. Yeah.. She has hairy legs though -.- AWKWARD. HAHAHA. Transferable Skills was mind-numbing ! I couldn't wrap my head around the 7th sheet! GAH. Although I did get some help from David, he showed every step, but then I had to restart from scratch by myself all over again because he undo everything! HAHAHA, omg, the torture -___- HE SO MEAN. But he said he's nice, MEH. Okay la, nice :P HEHE. I HAVE A FEELING I AM THE LAST IN MY CLASS. GOSH I THINK I JUST DIED. -.- BOO! I HATE THIS.

Friday, 14 October 2011:

Well, nothing much happened today, just did laundry! AT LAST! I sadly have to redo my report -_______- URGH. DAMN ANNOYING. So yeah, I let Kat read my Reflective Journal and she liked it, so that was cool! :D (Y) SO FUN! AHAH. Pretty much, that's it :B

Saturday, 15 October 2011:

Woke up damn early at 7.30am to go to Central London to meet up with Cat and Jeff :) So, it was literally an adventure for me! The East Anglia National Express services were having some engineering problems! -.- WHOOPEE. So I had to take a train to Ingatestone and take a coach from there to Newbury Park! WALAO. Then I had to take the Central Line using the Tube to Stratford, from there, I took the Jubilee line to go to Canada Water, then I went to the Overground to go to Forest Hill to meet Kak Lin so that I can pick up Kak Nia's Amazon package. HAHA. Had a nice time at Kak Lin's! Although, I was 30mins late for lunch with Jeff and Cat because of all the damn congestions and the amounts of stops the bus had to go through before arriving in Leicester Square a.k.a Chinatown. It's funny how I got lost finding the Oriental Delight shop, but I didn't get lost from Chelmsford to London! HAHAHAHA. WOW. We ended up eating at this yummy Korean shop! YUM :3 I promised Nav that I'll meet Nav soon :) I FEEL SO BAD NOW! HAHA. Should pop on by to Surrey real soon! Before Winter comes :) After Chinatown, we went our separate ways :'( SIGHS. But I got the opportunity to see Jeff's accommodation in Russell Square :D DAMN BIG MAN his room -.- I SO ENVY HIM! HAHA. Met his friends too! WOOT. HEHE. Then, we went to Regent's Park, knowing how blur I was, I didn't know that it was a royal park -___- PFFT. So, it didn't occur to me that the Frieze Art Fair was a fancy schmancy event and it cost 20-27pounds -________- GOSH. I'll pass. But I took some pics, a bit bland though :( SIGHS. But the park was damn huge and pretty too! HAHA, me and Jeff faced an awkward moment when we opened my sister's Amazon package to find out that it contained a BABY MONITOR .__________. WHAT THE CRAP? AHAHHA. I knew it was for her friend, but I kinda forgot about it at first, hence the awkwardness since I opened it in a public park with my guy best friend -.- HAHAHA.

SO, that was my 4th week in uni summed up in one whole post in conjunction of my 300th post! WOOT, no worries, there will be more to come :D

P/s: I will be using this post for my reflective journal as well :D CAN'T WAIT!

tabye

♥

Super Chin Day :)

2011-09-06T18:18:00.002+01:00

Dear Mental,

Yesterday was Tuesday, 6th of September 2011!

It was Super Chin Day :) HAHA. It was for me 'to celebrate and spend time with Chin Xing Tan' after not seeing him for 3 MONTHS since he left London for his Summer break after his AS Levels exams.

Pretty much, it was such an awesome lunch and dessert with Chin :) I missed him a lot so, go figure? HAHA.

We hang out in OU ! So, Chin brought me to this really yummy eating place called the Food Republic! It is new and he recommended me to have the Pepper Lunch ;) HAHA.

Of course, I went for it and the results, the food was DAMN YUMMY! While having lunch we were talking about sitcoms :) How different British sitcoms are compared to American sitcoms!

Then he started about The Office, which was so funny like shizz, then we went all BAZINGA like Sheldon, talked about how depressing Skins make people go even I find it damn awesome :P and all sorts of stuff.

After lunch, Chin took me to Uptown for dessert! Wahoo. :) He told me about Chatime and we went to buy drinks there. He had a Roasted Milk Tea and I had a Strawberry Milkshake and it was heaven :')

Delicious man! HAHA. Nice la Chin! AHAH. Well, he then had to send me home to my Ara house so we talked some more in the car. He is an excellent driver :) I gave him a thumbs up after 5 seconds of his driving! AHHAHAHA. I screamed anyhow. Because I was paranoid ;p As per usual LOL. HAHA. So yeah :)

I gave him a tour of my Ara house and talked about gay cats and kittens. LOL. The subjects we talk about man. At the end of the day, I got a hug from Chin that he owed me since 3 months ago! :') YAY. (Y) But it wasn't for 5 minutes, it was just a short nice one! HAHA. :)

Thanks again Chin for an awesome Super Chin Day :)

See you in London soon!

p/s: Congrats on getting straight A's for your AS Levels exams! :D

tabye

♥

I Give You The Truth and Nothing But The Truth

2011-09-03T18:45:00.003+01:00

Dear Mental,

Hi there.

Have you ever felt that you never EVER wanna make the same mistakes again?

Yeah. That is what I am feeling now.

Every time this weird feeling comes out, I just get too freaked out that I'll regret making a choice about it.

I mean, being honest about what you feel is never easy, especially when you feel something for someone.

How do you know if that feeling is real or just an emotional illusion? You know, like an optical illusion perhaps?

Because you think you can see it, but if you blink twice, it's just gone like that. Gone with the wind for that matter.

So maybe I'm just a coward because when it comes to revealing my feelings for someone, it ain't exactly the best thing to do when that someone doesn't feel the same way.

Nevertheless, I am going to just to wait because only time will tell if this feeling is true.

I will be leaving for London next Monday. So let's just see if I can get over this before I leave.

If I don't then, that's a sign. Hopefully, it'll be a good one.

I can never deny the way I feel about you.

Because it's my weakness to deny you, but it's my strength if I admit it because it will show how brave I am for taking a chance on something that might just be an epic disappointment.

So, I hope, with all this bare in mind, I just hope, a sign will come soon.

I just need to know, just need to know, if you're worth waiting for you know?

tabye

♥

I will forever remember the things that you did because all those things are the elements that opened my heart to you in the first place.

How Is It A Surprise?

2011-08-12T09:58:00.003+01:00

Dear Mental,

Seriously, I think I am glad that I didn't decide to delete my blog this time because there's so muich to talk about.

Well, yesterday was the last of my exams. Feel so relief, emotionally drained & physically drained.

I didn't fast yesterday, I wasn't feeling well for the last couple of days so I took a rest yesterday, but not exactly a proper one.

I woke up late for my last presentation -___-

FML. LIKE SERIOUSLY SERIOUS *as quoted by Catherine Tan*

HAHA, well enough about my topsy turvy day, it was also Nav & Rushi's departure back home.

It was damn overwhelmed :'( I felt so sad! I cried, like literally. So yeah, it was emotional. I really am missing Nav & Rushi already.

Can't believe we all stick to each other since the first day of college until now.

Literally, 7 months spent very well. :'D

We are all growing up & getting ourselves ready, for the other stage of REAL life, *UNI LIFE*

HAHA, first stage, COLLEGE, next, UNI. :')

Well, after saying our goodbyes, dividing chocolates & hugs&kisses, me & Jeff went to the neighbourhoo behind Bellerbys to go throw our Jawbreakers into the River Thames which we were suppose to do with Nav & Rushi before they left.

Nevertheless, me and Jeff threw the jawbreakers for Nav & Rushi. We made a wish for them too. After that, we threw ours! :)

So, yeah. That was pretty much it & sadly due to the riots, I have to postpone my trip to Chelmsford with Josh :( It's ok, I can go next week! Can't wait to bond with Joshua! YAY.

tabye

♥

I Just Hate Myself More Than Usual

2011-08-10T18:02:00.003+01:00

Dear Mental,

Today, I had an epiphany.

I seriously need to stop pulling my hair.

It's not only my size that is concerning me now, but my HAIR is also a MAJOR ISSUE NOW.

God help me & I know you will, please, just give me some SMACK IN THE FACE or something so that I WOULD STOP PULLING MY HAIR.

GODDAMNIT.

I just wanna punch something now.

Thank god for Action Item.
Currently obsessed with them.
So, got some distraction.

tabye

♥

1st of August, First Day of Ramadhan :D

2011-08-01T20:07:00.002+01:00

Dear Mental,
It is my first day of Ramadhan in London. ALONE. WOW. I seriously feel a tad bit weird not having my sahur and breaking fast with my family.
SIGHS. The life of a college student.
MEH.
But nevertheless, I have some of my college mates to hang on to, throughout my fasting month here :)
Yesterday, me and Fesa went to Queensway to buy halal sausages and food stuff so that we have stock of food during Ramadhan :D
It was fun because I get to bond with my sonny. HAHA ;)
I also brought him to Covent Garden just to look around for some souvenirs that might interest him so that he can bring some home for his friends and family!
We also met Jeff and his cousin before heading off to Central :D
HEE.
Then, we test drived boiling the sausages in our kettles ! HAHA, my so-called bright idea -.- HAHA. Somehow, it DID work! So YAY, HAHA, but then again, both our kettles ended up smelling like sausages -____-
HAHAHAHAH
Okay. So basically, that's pretty much it. Nothing else to report so far.
:) I'll update soon! Need to go buy food for buka puasa :D TATA.

tabye

♥

I Have A Lot On My Plate Now

2011-07-27T17:58:00.002+01:00

Dear Mental,

I have been thinking about my future, I am somewhat EXCITED and I just wanna know how it'll feel like to be in uni!

HAHA, well, I guess I would have to gear myself up first.

I am SO NOT READY for uni life yet.

HECK, I am still going to be in college actually!

AHAHA, oh yeah, did I mention that I will be going for Foundation In Architecture in Cambridge Ruskin International College first :)

After 2 terms of that, then next year in 2012 only I will attend my degree of BSc(Hons) Architecture in Anglia Ruskin University, Chelmsford!

Oh and another tid bit info, Joshua's dad is from Anglia Ruskin! HAHA, AWESOME! But he studied law :) DAMNN.

HAHA, Joshua kinda showed me some of his photos in Chelmsford :D So I am pretty much loving it! But I am yet to experience the way of living in Chelmsford!

But I reckon it's pretty nice and just right for me. I like small towns. They're adorable. In a really odd way!

It's like Greenwich! However, Joshua said that Greenwich is like TOWN TOWN while Chelmsford is like a suburb -,- HEH? HAHA, sadly I can't really tell the difference!

Gosh, okay. EPIC FAIL. This is how bad my ADD is! I was suppose to work on my British Culture Essay but sadly, I am here blogging! HAHA, it's okay! Nowadays, these are only times that I can actually blog for real! :) Without feeling weird because there's nothing to talk about, so yeah. That's pretty much my life now.

Oh, and I think I really need a therapist. Or maybe I just need to see eye candy. HAHA, I need to have a crush again. My taste of guys is beginning to fizzle out. And that ain't good! HAHA. Need to keep on a look out for some fish!

Alright then, enough for me. Shall get back to my whatsoever British Culture Essay -_-

tabye

♥

Am I Ready For The Future?

2011-07-25T19:41:00.004+01:00

Dear Mental,

I have 2 weeks left of college, and that is so overwhelming yet surreal.

I am glad that I have survived it so far.

I still can't believe that I spent 90% of my life this year in London.

It still haven't sunken in to me yet.

HAHA. Well, that's just my way of saying, "SOMEBODY JUST PINCH ME! THIS ALL MUST BE A GODDAMN DREAM RIGHT?!"

As per usual, my melodramatic personality is beginning to creep out of me! Which I think ain't a good thing. But, I love drama, so be it.

Speaking of drama, after the long wait, I have been given an unconditional offer to CRIC/ARU for Foundation in Architecture and Bsc(Hons) Architecture! YAY me. Alhamdulillah.

This will totally never happened without my parents, friends, teachers, god and of course myself! HAHA.

But yeah! Nevertheless, I am still bummed that my campus ain't the Cambridge campus. Instead I got the Chelmsford campus! But I like it! HAHA, I HOPE I WILL.

At the end of the term after our exams, Joshua is nice enough to allow me to tag along with him back to his dad's house in Chelmsford, Essex!

Another good thing about Chelmsford, it's just 30++mins to London by train! WOOT. AHAHAH. and it's a nice quiet town! Hopefully it's like Greenwich :D

Oh and another BIG INFO, Harry Judd is from Chelmsford ^.^ and they always carry out the V Festival there! YAY. So, I have a feeling or more like I know my best friends will flip when they know that I got the Chelmsford campus :)

So far so good. :) Can't wait to accept the offer. Just waiting for mama and Kak Nia to sent me the important details in order for me to apply for accommodation as well!

Uni, I think I am ready?

Allah, what do you think?

Okay, get back to me later, ASAP okay? HAHA.

tabye

♥

You'll Never Find Someone Like Me

2011-07-20T11:26:00.002+01:00

I think I know what I want.

Maybe, I don't need it.

Somtimes, something that you want ain't actually exactly your main priority.

Maybe, I just say that I want something/someone just because other people own it.

Maybe, just maybe.

Only time will tell if this feeling will fade or whatever need that I want might just be fulfilled in the near future.

I guess so.

tabye

♥

Moving On

2011-06-30T16:09:00.002+01:00

Dear Mental, it's been FOREVER since I blogged. Well, looked what happen?

Last term's in already and Summer has started :)

What a nice way to finish up life in Bellerbys. :) Although, the 'saying goodbye' part ain't much of a good thing. SIGHS. A few weeks ago I had to say goodbye to my awesome seniors and friends who finished their last term already. It was hard saying goodbye, I know that we would still be able to see each other when we come back to London in September for uni. Insyaallah :)

Speaking of unis, I for one am desperate in need for a place in a university. I have been rejected by 3 of my UCAS choices already, not to be over confident, but I didn't know that I would be at this state by July, -__-

Sighs, nevertheless, I am not giving up. Life's too short to just let everything go. I am still holding, or more like BARELY holding on. HAHA, So yeah, life has been very overwhelming these past couple of days. I would be lying if I said that college was easy. It's real life I tell you. It's just ready to get your guard down if you don't be careful.

Basically, what I've learned so far in Bellerbys is that:

I HAVE TO FOLLOW MY GUT PLEASE :)

And pray a lot :) HEE. So yeah. With a little bit of help from myself, Allah, family and friends, I am not surprised that I am still surviving in London :)

Okay dokay, since I have only a few hours left to move out from my old room to my new one, I should get going! :) Will update soon about my 'new' room. :)

tabye

♥

Guiding Myself Through Life

2011-02-22T16:50:00.002Z

Hey Mental! I am so sorry I have left you for about two months or so without any update about my new current life in London.
Yes, I am at last in London! :) It's like a dream come true. Haha. Oh well, it's already February and lots have happened!
I am currently starting my half term break tomorrow! YAY.
Haha, so really excited to have some break after working hard for the past month and a half.
I made quite a number of new friends and they're really nice :)
At least they're there to make me feel less homesick. :) I miss my friends back at home as well though :(
Alhamdulillah for the Internet :D HAHA.
Oh, I went to Maroon 5's gig last week by the way. It was DAMN awesome. I went for it with AJ, Nav and John, plus some other students from our college.
It was cool that the opening act was Sara Bareilles! She sings very well live! I salute her :')
Maroon 5 was obviously awesome! It was worth waiting for! And also worth £25! HAHA.
Luckily mama didn't flip when she found out that I went to see them!
She was just glad that I came back safely and in one piece :D
Well, so far so good. I am currently taking 3 subjects for this term:
a) Art b) English and an extra subject which is c) Business Maths
I got 64% PHEW. That's okay right? I mean , I missed 5 chapters damn it -__- HAHA, I am REALLY RUSTY, hence the marks.
Oh and plus, I suck at Business Arithmetic and I made TONS of SILLY MISTAKES according to Mr. Aslan :/ SIGHS.
But hey, guess what? John is going to be my tutor for FREE! :) Thanks John Lam :D
So, I really owe him :)
Not only that, I will be applying for AA with Emily and Fatima! WOOT.
EXCITED. Insyaallah I'll get in :)
My dream would be fulfilled to be in the best architecture school in London!
Okay, will stop here for now.
Loads more to tell!
Shall not cram everything in one post :)

tabye

♥

Disaster? I Guess?

2010-12-17T18:58:00.002Z

Dear Mental,

What's going on with the boys in bands? :O

I mean, Sash's LOVE, Dan Flint just got himself BLONDE hair like a few weeks ago!

And now guess what,

MARTIN BENNETT JOHNSON

turned

BLONDE HEADED

as well

-_____-

oh god.

I'm still TRYING.. or more like BARELY holding onto my seat when I saw his pics!

GAH

WHY MARTIN? WHY?

tabye

♥

Just Don't Panic

2010-12-16T15:32:00.003Z

Dear Mental,
It's been a WEEK since WE talked.
Is it me or maybe we're just not going to see each other anymore?
I know that I'm making it a big deal, but I never thought of it as a bad thing until a few people actually pointed it out.
"Why didn't you try calling and go out?" "Didn't you try texting?"
After those questions were asked, finally I realised there was like somewhat rather a 'HOLE' in my chest *As quoted by Bella Swan from The Twilight Saga*
So, I'm guessing, I feel empty when you're not around?
Why do I even feel this way about you?
GEEZ.
I'd have to admit, having you around was much more, happy? or gleeful?
Oh god. More like I just feel like I don't want you to go away from my sight.
Mother told me, at some point, these were those feelings which I rarely get unless I met someone like you.
YaAllah? Really?
WHY. OH.WHY.
To be honest, you were the FIRST person who actually made me feel this way so badly.
Let's just hope, you're not just another useless bad memory that will be remembered.
I want you to be an unforgettable memory which I would keep wanting to repeat like a photographic memory in my mind.
You were the one who started this scene, so let's not just let the unsaid scripts left hanging.
Maybe,just maybe, one day you'll come back into the picture and add a beautiful caption to it for both of us to remember forever.
Let me remind you, I'll be leaving.
So, if you have anything to say to me, just say it before I leave.
You have 15 DAYS.

'Cause you can't avoid me now, you'll be just fine without me, tell me the stories when I get home.

tabye

♥

Maybe It's Time For Reality

2010-12-16T14:53:00.002Z

Dear Mental,
Found my old old 'Fitness First' book.
I accidentally landed on this particular page which had these 2 particular quotes which I should've and will live by from now.
Since only now, when I read it properly and interpreted it properly then only I can understand fully what both quotes were trying to say.
Sorry, it takes me awhile to understand something. So if you have a problem with that, then I think you better go read some other blogger's blog.
So one of the quotes were;

" What you were then, is what you have become. It is a timeless journey that affirms growing up being a beautiful tragic-comedy."

As quoted from the Malaysian teen dramedy 'Goodbye Boys' creator and director, Bernard Chauly under Red Films Production which also produced Gol & Gincu : The Movie and Gol & Gincu : The Series.

The second beautiful quote that I find IRONICALLY TRUE LITERALLY is;

"Education is our ticket out. Youth is a time when everything seems exaggerated. A slow dance with your girl/boy means everything. People's actions and deeds affect you in a big way."

Of course, the quote was also from the movie 'Goodbye Boys' which starred the famous Malaysian actors, Lisa Surihani and Razif Hashim as the lead female and lead male role.

Okay, haha, I guess I love this movie so much, that I am kinda stuck to it (;

So I guess, that's what I'm trying to say. :) The quote really says, 'TEEN ANGST'! and it LITERALLY speaks on behalf of ALL of US TEENS generally.

tabye

♥

Aim For The Stars and You'll Never Be Shot Down

2010-12-16T11:26:00.002Z

Dear Mental,

16 DAYS

Being strong is only an option, not responsibility.

I've been longing for this moment and yet I am afraid to go for it.

tabye

♥

Overwhelmed Due To Your Absence From My Life

2010-12-16T11:04:00.002Z

Dear Mental,

I was just going through my old ancient toy chest which I haven't lay a finger on for like? what 5 years, HAHA. So I found a random notebook that I used to have.
I was so, somehow, OVERWHELMED.
I've never felt this emotionally affected in such a long time.
I think senior year is just always like.
I saw like old pictures of my family and I.
I took all of the pictures with my polaroid camera.
It was worth it.
Sighs.
Seriously, can the end of 2010 get any more emotional?
I guess so.

I've never felt this overwhelmed with life.

So far, life is good, but let's hope it'll be better.

tabye

♥

I Am Outdated To The Max

2010-12-14T09:13:00.002Z

Dear Mental,

I've officially lost it.

I am DAMN OUTDATED.

Can I just slap myself any harder?

GEEZ.

Post-SPM made ME dull-er than before,

Thanks.

My life is officially boring.

*excluding meeting my LOVELYS and my FAMILY*

My ME time is RUINED.

DIEDIEDIE.

not everything is as easy as 'A B C'

tabye

♥

Aim For The Stars and You'll Never Be Shot Down

2010-12-14T03:38:00.005Z

Dear Mental,

18 DAYS LEFT.

Being strong is only an option,not responsibility.

At this rate, life's too much to handle.

tabye

♥

Stephen Schriner SPAM!

2010-12-10T04:52:00.005Z

Dear Mental,
Stephen Lawrence Schriner is FTW.
Like, for shizz (;
SPAM begins,
NOW.

First Things First, he writes awesome songs :)

And sings them awesome-ly (;

TWLOHA! Supported ;)

Doggie day out :)

Current Stephen Schriner (:

tabye

♥

College Am I Ready?

2010-12-09T09:08:00.007Z

Classes are in session :)
Welcome to Cyprus-Rhodes College :D
Meet the 'GREEKS' :)

Get ready, college's going to be a splash!

When 2 hearts meet, it's just a case of 'He/She loves me' or 'He/She loves me not'

Casey & Cappie

Forever is here :')

Because perfect isn't the word, but perfect timing ;)

Together, we can conquer the world :)

All's fair in love and war!

tabye

♥

All I Want For Christmas Is...

2010-12-08T14:12:00.004Z

The Big Bang Theory :)

All please? Who is sweet enough? HAHA, :)

tabye

♥

Over and Done With

2010-12-08T09:25:00.002Z

Dear Mental,
guess what?

I'm done with SPM :)

YAHOO!

AWESOME huh?

Insyaallah I'll get 9A+'s !

*crossing my fingers*

YAY (Y)

So, I am ready to chill and spend time with my family & friends :')

Going to enjoy the last few weeks of 2010!

At last, this year, I'm spending New Years in Malaysia! :')

CAN'T WAIT!

okay, going to watch BBT! :')

tabye

♥

3 Years and It's Going Further, I Hope.

2010-10-27T17:55:00.004+01:00

Dear Mental,
It took me exactly 4 DAYS to find a PROPER way to tell him that I'll be leaving on his birthday.
And at last YESTERDAY was it!
HAHA, I told him I wanted to tell him something.
I'm glad he was patient enough to wait for it.
LMAO. You know boys, they just want you to blurt it out.
While walking with him and Amirah I told him.
Yes, I told him that I'm leaving in January instead of December.
He looked at me and said, "January? Which is on my birthday."
I couldn't help to apologise.
I told him to celebrate at the airport with me and Amirah :)
HAHA. And he said, "Let's celebrate on the way to the airport okay?"

Nice, :)

I owe you San Vei Sean.

3 years of friendship is good enough.

But, I still owe you an awesome 18th birthday present before leaving you.

Can't wait.

I shall punch you before I go :')

you're awesome and you know it!

tabye

♥

It Ain't That Bad

2010-10-27T17:45:00.004+01:00

Hey Mental! It was a good day yesterday :)
Surprisingly!
:') At last I met Ashiqin after THREE SHIQIN-LESS weeks :p bluek.
I miss that girl like MAD.
HAHA. and I miss TASH too :)
Why la you had to go to Sabah again?
oh yeah, SPM.
Speaking of the 'TOPIC' above, I shouldn't even be anywhere near the laptop! -.-
But, mama gave in because I wanted to email Mr. Leo about my uncertainties about my UNFINISHED PORTFOLIO -.-
DIEDIEDIEDIE.
HEE.
So yeah, life is okay now.
MINUS SUCKY TRIAL results. fry that for all I care.
HAHA. Well, mantap is going on.
Will end next week? I think so.
I DUNNO, haha.
PLUS! Graduation robes are here!!! YAY (Y)
Going to wear a brown baju kurung for graduation :) and my butterfly necklace!
Mama and bapak are coming :)
So yeah, I guess that's it really!
Will update more soon :)

tabye

♥

It Was A Nightmare

2010-10-24T06:23:00.002+01:00

Dear Mental,
I had a dream about him :)
But sadly, a BAD one :(
I dreamt that we had fight because I told him I'm going to London on his birthday.
He was furious. He was screaming. -.-
That's not normal of him, I know him too well..
Well, maybe not that well.
I know dreams are stupid.
But I haven't told him yet.
So, I thinking when should I tell him.
I want to see his reaction.
I know that he wouldn't be emotional, but I just want to see his reaction when I say,
"Hey, guess what? I'm not going on 30th December, I'm going on 3rd of January, your birthday"
SIGHS.
Please. I hope you'll be there before I go. :/

tabye

♥

You Can Never Take Back Those Words You Said To Me

2010-10-21T17:23:00.004+01:00

You gave me hope.
You were someone who I thought might be different.
Well you are, you were.
I never noticed you.
But I insisted that there must something that I can do to make you be someone in my life.
You became my friend.
We talked, we hang out, we laughed.
We understood each other.
You understood me, and vice versa.
For the first time, things like this happens both ways to me.
I thought, "Maybe, I'll give it a go? I mean, no harm trying right?"
Unfortunately, we went through some rough patches which suddenly existed out of the blue.
I didn't know how it happen.
It just did.
I almost thought of giving my heart to you. But, no.
I backed out at the last minute.
I saw signs of insecurities, doubts, uncertainties, fear, rejection & etc.
I knew I never want to get involved with that.
I went through enough 2 years ago.
That was the last straw.
I know people say, you can never avoid getting hurt when you're in love.
But to feel the pain, once, even when you're not in the relationship, it sucks worse that being in one.
You get it?
We haven't talked for more than a month now.
Can I just say that, your actions are immature.
I'm sorry to say, but when everyone was announced that I'm leaving at the end of year, I couldn't help but to feel proud that I made you feel bad.
At the corner of my eye, I saw your expression.
I felt like you deserved every bit of that 'REJECTION' in your face.
You left me hanging like a rag doll.
I am like an unfinished book.
I am just a person that you manipulated.
I know you don't mean it.
But, how is it that I am THE ONLY ONE THAT YOU DON'T TALK TO?
You talk to my friends. EXCEPT ME.
Isn't it awkward huh?
I am used to this okay?
My mum told me, guys are like that.
They can never face the ugly damn truth.
You said you would miss me when I leave.
I just wonder now, will you feel the same way now?
You say that you're not talking to me because you're stressing out over EXAMS.
EXCUSE ME. Are you the ONLY ONE taking this STINKING SPM?
FTW.
FML.
Damn YOU. Damn you and your sweet words, damn you with your stupid ignorant ways of making me think we could be friends.
Damn you.
You are what I regret.
I don't know what to say anymore.
Why do I have to be the victim?
I shouldn't feel victimised, I know.
But, this is someone who had a special place in my heart who did this to me.
You gave up on me, for what? NOTHING.
I can ignore you, and I will.
If that's how you wanna play the game, so let's be it.
May you be happy with what you planned.
Because I am.

tabye

♥

Why la Nirmala, why? :D

2010-10-21T17:13:00.002+01:00

Dear Mental, guess what?
Miss Nirmala told the WHOLE TUITION CENTRE that I'm going off to London -_-!
Why la Nirmala, WHY? HAHA Seriously?
I dunno where to hide my face now.. HAHA
Well, at least Sean and the dousche knows already.
Speaking of Sean, I told him that I was SUPPOSE to go on HIS birthday, but changed of plans because I'm going EARLIER instead T.T
I seriously hope Sean's going to be there when I'm going to London. He's one of the people that I want to say goodbye to before I go off.
I know we're just friends, but we've been friends since form 3 and Mental, you know I always get EMOTIONALLY ATTACHED to people easily.
So, not seeing him there, might just make me feel a tad bit sad.
SIGHS, so yeah. I haven't told Alyp Lee and Tash that I'm going early :'(
NEED TO TELL A.S.A.P!
Okay, mama just came in -.-
DIEDIEDIE, HAHA.
Why can't you KNOCK?
-_- I know I'm wearing GINORMOUS HEADPHONES, but I still can hear if you DON'T KNOCK.
Shall stop here, DON'T BE EMO BAIZURA!
HAHA, LAME.
so I guess that's all for now.

tabye

♥

I Hope They'll Stay

2010-10-21T17:08:00.003+01:00

Dear Mental,

Yesterday was a SPECIAL DAY for TWO SPECIAL PEOPLE! ;)

Yes, Gon + Yeow = LOVE :D

Happy Belated 6 MONTH Anniversary Amirah & Yeow :)

♥

I hope you'll stay this way forever

:')

And I DO mean it :D

WEE.

(Y)

tabye

♥

My Time Is Now

2010-10-21T16:27:00.003+01:00

Dear Mental,
I got accepted to Bellerbys College in London! (; YAY. (Y)
YAY is not only the word, but BOO HOO too :B I'm leaving Malaysia and my LOVELYS :(
That's okay, life's full of challenges :D I can do this!
HAHA. So I am leaving in the 30th of December 2010... In the morning -.-
I can't believe my PLANS of spending NEW YEARS here are RUINED. GEEZ.
DAMN, but I hope my LOVELYS will be there for my departure :O
I really wanna see them before I leave for London.
Apparently according to mama, I won't even be able to come back to take my SPM results :'(
My holidays are limited. SIGHS.
Speaking of LIMITED hols, SPM's around the corner, which reminds me, GRADUATION'S around the corner too.
Haven't picked which baju kurung to wear.
Er, it's Friday already -_- okay, Well enough chit chat. Sadly, I have to continue tomorrow!
So, okay then.
Will update MORE SOON :)

p/s: I changed my font :)

HAHA.

LAME :p

tabye

♥

NEXT!

2010-10-17T06:12:00.003+01:00

Dear Mental,
Life's never been more confusing than anything!
ESPECIALLY when you're SEVENTEEN.
Life is just topsy turvy just like the mess in your own room.
HAAH.
So, I've got great news to tell!!!
But, of course, I shall tell later.
Because now, readers, click on the link below.
amuse yourselves with various stories about people's BAD DATES :')
It's cute and funny!

http://www.abadcaseofthedates.com/

I've seen bettter days, and those are when I think about how lucky I am to have a good life :)

tabye

♥

Hot Damn, That Boy's So Fine

2010-10-10T04:55:00.003+01:00

Hey, babe :)
HAHA.
Oh yeah.
I love him so much I can die of heartache! (;
Danny Jones you are to die for!
Like fo shizz. :0

WALAO. =O= WTF. HAHAHA.

That's a LONG SHOT to me :O

Courtesy of Dannymcfly's TWITTER :)
Damn boy.

Shine a light on him eh eh :) HAAHA. Trying out the Taio Cruz ROCKSTARR glasses. p;

EPIC.EPIC ^.^

HAHA, I shall say this once;

Rockstarr Jones :D

Courtesy of Dannymcfly's TWITTER too :)

tabye

♥

MUST BE CITIZEN OF SUPER CITY!

FTW.

You Must've Wrote The Book

2010-10-09T04:47:00.002+01:00

Hello Mental :)
It's been a WEEK I think? Since I've abandoned you? LMAO.
Don't be sad! I'm back!
Well just for awhile! TRIALS are OVER!
But SPM's around the corner too D:
My future is HERE AND NOW.
Allah, I can't mess this up!
HAHA. Well, just a lil' update, skipped school yesterday!
WOOT. Stayed at home and chilled. Chem paper got me!
Ah, and skipped Nirmala too -_-
DAMN. Hahah. But no worries, I'm going for Q&A TODAY :)
YAY me :) LMAO. So going to see Kausar, Saras and Audrey! Can't wait.
Haven't seen Myra in a while.. :0 but we tweet each other :)
Can't wait for our St. Trinians Night together after SPM! :')
Em, yeah, next, Sash is 'designing' my PROM DRESS :')
So I GUESS I am going to prom. But, not sure who else is going :O
Asked Kausar, Dalila and Audrey :) They said no PROBLEM!
Awesome. So far that's it really. Okay, then. Guess that's all.
Update later!

tabye

♥

Sunday Family Day

2010-10-03T14:21:00.002+01:00

Dear Mental :)
Today, studied a bit and then spent the whole day at Putra Stadium, Bukit Jalil today! :)
We watched the ATP World Tour Malaysian Open :) WEE.
Although none of the players that I adore were there but it's okay!
Had TONS of FUN!
HEE, so yeah. watched the Men Doubles Final & Men Singles Final!
SO damn AWESOME.
And because of THAT Megat Adlan said I'm a stinking rich girl :p
HAHA. Douschebag ;)
I miss you Megat Adlan Sufri :)
LMAO. Yeah.
Weekend was a drag, minus TODAY.
HAHA. wait, MINUS a BIT of yesterday :)
Met with Sheira, Zaini, Kak Keena at Kak Zaza's OPEN HOUSE ;)
Oh yeah, BONDED with my 12 year old nephew, Iqbal :)
Such a sweetheart!
well yeah, basically that's it really ;)
okay then, going to watch HALFWAY of the Commonwealth in Delhi 2010 opening!
TTFN (Y)

tabye

♥

How Could This Happen To Me?

2010-10-01T10:55:00.002+01:00

JAMES JOSEPH 'JIM' PARSONS' GAY?!
FML.
And I THOUGHT that NERDS/GEEKS are PROFOUNDLY BETTER than PLAYBOYS/PRETTY BOYS.
DAMN IT.
He's getting engaged ); SIGH. To his long time boyfriend.. UM. I forgot his NAME -_-' SORRY!
okay then.
That's it really.
GOSH.
Such a waste of 5 minutes ;) HAHA.
McFly's SuperCity needs ADOBE Flash Player -_______-" WHY LA LIKE THIS >_> LAZY
TRIALS; 2 WEEKS done. ONE MORE to go and 8 MORE PAPERS TO GO -.-
Okay then TTFN :)

I finally figured out, exactly who I wanna be :)

-First Grade Heroes by Stephen Schriner-

tabye

♥

Don't Wanna Be On My Own

2010-09-19T05:53:00.001+01:00

Cyprus Rhodes University

2010-09-19T05:51:00.000+01:00

Guilty Pleasure

2010-09-19T05:39:00.000+01:00

You're Making My Heart Stop Beating Please Don't Let Me Down

2010-09-19T04:23:00.004+01:00

You and Me We're Meant To Be, We're Meant To Be Together

2010-09-19T04:18:00.002+01:00

Welcome To Kappa Tau, How May I Help You?

2010-09-19T04:13:00.000+01:00

I'll Hold Your Hand Until You Go To Sleep

2010-09-19T04:05:00.002+01:00

Hi There Joe Birch :)

2010-09-19T04:02:00.001+01:00

A Sisterhood & Brotherhood Combined Makes A Perfect Family

2010-09-17T16:33:00.000+01:00

Allah You Created Me, So You Can Take Me Away Too

2010-09-17T16:30:00.001+01:00

Best Friends Stick Together

2010-09-17T16:26:00.000+01:00

Buzz Off Paedophile!

2010-09-17T16:06:00.001+01:00

I Snapped. My God.

2010-09-17T15:57:00.001+01:00

Time of Our Lives

2010-09-17T12:50:00.000+01:00

Please Don't Let Me Down

2010-09-13T11:55:00.002+01:00

Dear Mental,
Raya update later okay?
TIRED from the 'DRAMA'.
It was fo shizz, the most STRESSFUL Raya EVER.
Heck, it didn't feel like RAYA.
Felt like a normal holiday.
JEEZ.

I'd still think of us even if there's no you in me anymore.

Goodbye, I love you.

So much.

it was hard saying goodbye.

but i just had to.

because you wanted to.

tabye

♥

The Way I Fell In

2010-09-08T10:28:00.002+01:00

Dear Mental,

Today is just a very slow day for me.

I wish you would read this.

You know you can be honest with me..

Where did we go wrong?

Did I do something wrong?

Seriously, I hope we'll be fine.

ROB McCURDY of TMO ♥

Tell Me I'm Wrong.

"Tell me I'm wrong, you lost the love you needed most, tell me I'm wrong, forgotten everything you know, tell me I'm wrong, the reasons why I'm letting go."

Tell Me I'm Wrong by The Morning Of

tabye

♥

Keep Me Grounded

2010-09-04T06:25:00.003+01:00

Nick & Norah's Infinite Playlist!
:)
NEED TO WATCH IT AFTER SPM!
WOOT.
Trials are after RAYA.
-.-
DAMN.

Not only that, listen to GOOT people!

AHHAH

Alex Goot!

Find him on YouTube!

Listen to his cover of MJ's "Beat It" and Taio Cruz's "Dynamite"!

DAMN AWESOME!

HE IS ADORABLE TOO!

SUCH AN ADORABLE NERD :')

tabye

♥

Missed 7 days of FASTING );

Advantage Life

2010-08-29T16:33:00.003+01:00

Dear mental,
Can you handle life?
I know I can't.

Life & Death.

It's 50/50 right?

So try Schrodeiner's Cat.

Then you know how risky the decisions that you make.

It's 50/50 too you know?

It's never easy facing the truth.

You'll never know if you're going to get hurt or you're going to be surprised :)

But life can be unpredictable.

So, i'll take risks and make the most of it.

tabye

♥

Juno MacGuff & Paulie Bleaker

2010-08-29T04:27:00.003+01:00

Dear Mental,
If you've noticed, I'm OBSESSED with JUNO :)
YES.
I.
AM.

I WANNNNNT. LOVE JUNO LOVE JUNO.
HAHA. The JUNE-BUG bit me COMPLETELY!
I blame Zaini for this ;)

Orange Tic Tacs are YUMMY :)

I want you MICHAEL CERA!!!!!

♥

SIGHS :')

Juno ♥ Paulie

FOREVER

tabye

♥

There's No Way That I'll Say No

2010-08-28T06:40:00.002+01:00

Michael Cera is ♥

Damn you.

I'm in love :)

You say the most stupidest things, and that's why I'm interested :)

"Nothing's bigger than love.." Bigger Than Love by My Favourite Highway :)

tabye

♥

We Have A Reputation To Uphold

2010-08-14T09:36:00.004+01:00

Dear mental :)

Did I mention how much I missed GREEK?

OH, I didn't! -.-

HAHAH. Well yeah. I miss GREEK DAMN BADLY!

So just been PIC HUNTING.

Found this :)

Sisters stay together, even OFF SET ;)

L-R: Dilshad Vadasaria as Rebecca Logan, Tiffany Dupont as Frannie & Spencer Grammer as Casey Cartwright :)

They are all from the famous sorority in Cyprus-Rhodes University(CRU) which is Zeta Beta Zeta (ZBZ)!

♥

Sadly, Tiffany played Frannie until Season 2!

That's okay! More new characters!

Can't wait for my MARATHON with Sush after SPM!

tabye

♥

I Have A Crush On You

2010-08-13T16:09:00.012+01:00

Dear mental,

You don't have to be sociable to be liked ;)
Yeah. JJ JONES I'm talking about you boy (;
My new crush is: Ollie Barbieri who plays JJ Jones in Skins Season 3-4 ; One of the lead guys in the Second Generation of Skins :)

JJ talking to Emily :')

They're cute together!

Why so SERIOUS :O

OLLIE! ♥

Luke Pasqualino & Ollie Barbieri who plays Freddie McLair & JJ Jones
♥

CUTIE PIES!

Second Generation (not all of them)

I posted this pic a few months ago :)

But that's okay :)

The BOYS of SKINS Second Generation :)

L-R: Freddie McLair(played by Luke Pasqualino), JJ Jones(Ollie Barbieri) & James Cook(played by Jack O'Connell)

FIT :O

I WANNA BE THIS GIRL!

been watching Skins Season 3 tonight :)

LOVING IT ALREADY :)

♥

tabye

♥

I Can Walk Away Now

2010-08-13T07:58:00.002+01:00

Dear Mental.

Please tell me that I shouldn't waste my time being emotionally attached to people whom I don't even know.

I knew hoping wasn't the next best thing to do.

But I still did in case anything happens along the way.

I'm sorry it made you feel uncomfortable.

I felt like as if you knew all along.

Did you?

I guess I'll never know unless you'll tell me.

tabye

♥

I'm Just Me

2010-08-13T07:38:00.003+01:00

Hey mental.

Life has never been this interesting.
Turning 17 was just one thing, having to find out that you're leaving school in just a few months and that your life depends on just 9 subjects which are going to be summed up to only 2 hours for each of the subjects is just stressful. :/
GOSH.
Ramadhan just started. And so far, it's been okay. 3 DAYS done. 27 to go! :)
Tuition's fine.
Break fast at Nirmala's on the first day of Ramadhan with Amirah, Kausar, Ariff , Yong & Anisah :)
Been discussing about weird topics lately in school.
So yeah. Basically that's it.

p/s: I'm not a PRESIDENT anymore ;)

YAY.

tabye

♥

Opposites Attract

2010-08-09T13:02:00.002+01:00

Dear mental,

We're like peanut butter and jelly ;

We're totally different and yet we look good together :)

tabye

♥

I'm Missing A Piece of Courage In Me

2010-08-09T12:36:00.003+01:00

Hye mental
Tiring day.
Eddie Lim came to school today to talk about WASH-ROOMZ.
Oh yeah.
HU AGM. Apparently.
Oh Allah, please help?
I'm dying.
ATE TONS of CUPCAKES.
NGAM.
HAHA.
Watched SKINS.
Slept through BIO. Sorry Pn. Nitce. All I heard was 'PROJECT'!
Ramadhan in 1 DAY. HURRAH!
SPM Trials in 1 MONTH 12 DAYS.
Speaking of cupcakes, talked to Toof and Nima. I never knew WONDERMILK till Toofie drank a cup of drink from WONDERMILK and brought it to Nirmala ;)
Told Nima that Fikri & Irfan's band wanna perform for 'New York New York 2010' :) WOOTS!
Basically that's it.
YEAH.

tabye

♥

17 For 7 Days :)

2010-08-08T04:10:00.003+01:00

hey mental. It's been 2 weeks. So sorry I've been abandoning you :'( Been busy with school and I've been sick for a week, so more reasons to stay off the net. I mean, it's not like it can make me feel better.

So I've been 17 for a whole week. Well, not EXACTLY 7 DAYS, but I'm getting there ;D

It was nice turning 17. :) My lovelys were so excited that I turned 17! I don't even know why! :) HAHA. So It was nice hearing happy birthday wishes from everyone :)

So yeah, nothing much to update.

Well, i mean there is A LOT TO UPDATE. But I'll tell more later :)

So today is my party. And I'm still UNFORTUNATELY not dressed up! -.-

My party is in like 30 minutes D:

HAAHA.

The boys aren't coming because there's Nirmala today.

At least my girls are coming :)

Can't wait to play Twister :)

I wonder if Uncle Shariff is coming?

SIGHS.

tabye

♥

Hang In There, Baby

2010-07-24T00:08:00.002+01:00

Good luck Charlie :)

Welcome to Malaysia.

I don't know if people would love you here.

I know I do :)

LOL.

Can't wait to watch you!

tabye

♥

Teacher's Concert 2010

2010-07-15T13:51:00.002+01:00

Hell yeah, it was AWESOME.
Today was the day Sri Aman teachers make history.
Their own concert was held.
♥

TEACHERS OF Sri Aman are just ;

DAMN AWESOME :)

nuff said baby.

Together, we are awesome :)

Students & teachers combined!

♥

tabye

♥

Mammia Mia Was On

2010-07-10T17:08:00.007+01:00

Hari K Pics :)
Here's what I did!

VIC. Volunteer In Charge!!! :) Hee. That's me & Sangita with the orphans :)

Charity work is nice :D
Me, Izzatun & Sangita with the kids :)

Heaven by 5SD ;)
We were the angels in charged!
Although Mas was the ODD ONE ;) She's suppose to be in Hell. ;0
HAHAHA. SORRY, but it's true!
You're in charge of the Hell booth!
L-R: Ashiqin, Amirah, Me & Mas :)

Me and the C2AGE mascot!

Me and the kids with Sangita!

credits to Iman Nadira for taking the pic!

Kudos to Aisyah Amran!

It's her camera!

Group photo :)

Oh yeah :)

It was one heck of a Hari K!

Tired but fun

tabye

♥

I See A Milk Carton With Your Face On It

2010-07-05T15:13:00.002+01:00

Dear Mental,

These were people I met during my last School Carnival 2010:

Natalie Hew, Bairavi&Rubini, Aiman, Heidi, Jun Ray, Ghazali, Megat, Izzul, Wai Joon, Jai, Brandon, Ammar, Andrew, Aravind, Shahir, Adi & Shazmeer!

Thanks for coming to Heaven by 5SD

We appreciate it!

we understood nothing but only the words of hello & goodbye.

tabye

♥

You'd Do Anything For These Kind of Wonders

2010-06-30T11:40:00.004+01:00

Hey,
GON.
This post is for you :)
I owe you.

"Mama always said, "Life was like a box of chocolates, never know what you're gonna get."

-Forrest Gump-

Life is a piece of cake ; It's sweet, fun, exciting & just full of surprises!

Candies.

Too much of good thing is bad o;

tabye

♥

Jolly Good Lassies :)

2010-06-30T11:16:00.005+01:00

Dear 30/06/2010 babies,

I just wanna say:

to Kausar Kamarul & Kathleen Victor!

♥

You're only 17 once, sweeties.

Make it last.

tabye

♥

Freshly Harvested

2010-06-30T09:55:00.002+01:00

Dear Mental,

WEDNESDAY :)

Hello.
Today was an OKAY day.
Shiqin didn't come.
LOL. Yeah. Sleepy.
RANDOM:

FARMVILLE I MISS YOU!

D':

Okay. enough of that MADNESS ;)

Rangers' meeting was good (;

LOVE THEM JUNIORS!

HAHA.

Hari K in 2 DAYS.

OMGG..

Going to help Orphans on that day!

YAY. :')

Need to bring dad's camera!!! :)

Okay then, TA.

tabye

♥

ROAR.

2010-06-29T08:17:00.004+01:00

BLOGSTER.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

PERIOD PAIN CRAMPS.

nuff said.

tabye

♥

FISH YOU PMS.

Dear Best Friends

2010-06-28T17:04:00.002+01:00

Dear best friends,

Together we can take over the world :)

-BaizuraYusof-

Can't wait for END YEAR PARTY after SPM 2010.

WE SERIOUSLY NEED IT :D

I want to be pretty like all of you.

You are my mirror and you are the only ones that I can trust with my whole life :)

♥

tabye

♥

Hurricane of Katrina

2010-06-28T16:50:00.002+01:00

Erm, YEAH. HELLO.

HAHAHA. Okay.. Sorry.. I've been DEAD for a few days. YEAH. Dad was taking control of the laptop. SO it's not like I can do anything.

GOSH. =O=

So LALALA. Sash just got back from Kem Perdana and she's aching like MAD. Myra puasa today.. Tash is preparing for Pre Trials OH MY. I wanted to puasa THIS WEEK. But NOOO.. PERIOD had to come -.- DAMNIT.

Okay. SO BUSYBUSY JULY's COMING! Ya Allah WHY LA???

EW.

I need to plan Installation, Hari K , Heaven And Hell's going to be EXCITING! HAHAH., Trips to SPCA/PAWS, Folios. THEN, Ignore nagging of teachers... OH YEAH. And Trials are coming like Hurricane Katrina coming towards U.S.A. -____-! Sorry States.

OKAY. That's pretty much it.. More update LATERS.

tabye

♥

What To Do?

2010-06-24T09:14:00.002+01:00

Dear you,

Tell ME ;

What to do?

I don't know what to study S:

I feel so demotivated now.

GOSH

Mum thought she heard me crying...

-.-

WHAD?

AHAHAH.

tabye

♥

I Taught Myself The Way of Life

2010-06-23T09:53:00.004+01:00

Dear future me,

You are what I regret

-BaizuraYusof-

2010

Skins ; Tralalalala :)

TonyMichelleSid

BFF'S

♥

Hope you'll get a boy best friend and the best boyfriend (;

tabye

♥

Day 3: Today Was A Better Day

2010-06-09T17:00:00.003+01:00

Dear Mental,

Rainy day yesterday (;
Ate lunch with Zoe at Yogi Tree, Gardens!
Got to know her better! :)
Such a nice gal :)
Mr. Saravanan thought us History today :D ♥
He's THE MOST AWESOME TEACHER EVER!
After that, went to grocery.
Ate M&M's and got HIGH again.
Went with Gon, Kausa, Audrey and Zoe.
Met Sean and Alif there.
Alif got high on Cincau & Sean got high on Mentos + M&M's!
Zoe ate Maggi Cup, NICE ;)
RAINED LIKE CRAZY!
HAHAHAH, ran in the rain.
All of us collided with each other. (;

Finally made it through the lonely, to the other side.

-Terrified by Katharine McPhee ft. Zachary Levi-

tabye

♥

Day 2 : I Should've Went With My Heart

2010-06-09T16:31:00.002+01:00

Second day was EW. HAHAHAHA.

But I made a new tuition mate :)

Hee. Her name is Zoe Lim :D

YAY.

I thought she was my age when actually, she's my junior -.-I FELT SO EMBARRASSED!

Even my junior looks more mature than I do! :O

SIGHS.

That's okay. I'm TOO YOUNG AT HEART ;)

HAHHAHA.

Yeah. Moving on. Had lunch with Shahira, Sean and Satyan at KFC.

So yeah.

HAD A YUMMY ZINGER BURGER :B

During History ; Let's just say I was TRYING VERY HARD TO KEEP MYSELF FROM SLEEPING.

HAHAHA.

Then Miss Nirmala called me, Dalila and Sean! =.= She saw us looking HALF DEAD through the CCTV. HAAHAH.

SORRY TEACHER! ;)

Shahira, Audrey and Sean were ADDICTED to my iTouch APPS ;) HAHAH.

Then, me, Amirah and Zoe got HIGH on M&M's ;D

SO yeah basically that's it about TUESDAY!

p/s: I ♥ you, Ben Lyons (;

YOU'RE SO HOTT

tabye

♥

Last Thoughts of The Day

2010-06-07T16:16:00.004+01:00

If I were to really become a DOCTOR ;) THIS will happen!
(more like it happened during Bio class!)

Ariff: Hey Dr. Baizura.

Me: LOL. Yeah?

Ariff: If I need any medical attention, would you give me some?

Me: *LAUGHS* LOL. What the? No, I won't I'm a Paedatrician. I won't treat you.

Ariff: Oh, that's okay. When I break my leg then I'll go to you okay?

Me: *SHAKES HEAD* LOL. Yeah sure!

can boys get any funnier with their questions?

HAHA.

tabye

♥

Day 1 : I Gave In When Staring At A Box of Rocky

2010-06-07T13:39:00.006+01:00

Dear bloggers,

I'm just a messed up kid with big dreams

-BaizuraYusof-

2010

Lucas Pasqualino a.k.a Luca or Luke Pasqualino

Freddie McLair

in E4 Skins Series 3=4

Good evening fellow BLOGGERS (; haha. Well, today had Nirmala Crash Course. But UNFORTUNATELY HAHA I WOKE UP LATE. So, yeah. I missed Chem and Bio -.- WHOA. HAHAHA. At least I made it to History, Physics and Add Maths :D

It's just like Form 3 all over again! AW. Remember the good times Sean? :) SADLY he doesn't read my blog =.= hahaha. Not many people do anyway. (;
So moving on, I had a GREAT time with Amirah and Sean :D
Can't wait for tomorrow! :) HEE.

I am thinking about MEDICINE now :) SO need to WORK EXTRA HARD :)

Oh gosh. And there's like PILES of WORK! -____________-'

SO wish ME LUCK dears :)

tabye

♥

I'm Trying To Break Through

2010-06-05T17:40:00.002+01:00

Skins :) You are my life now (;

Alvin and The Chipmunks inspired ke? HAHA

oh wait, Theodore wears GREEN not YELLOW ;D

HAHAHA

now the boys remind me of POWER RANGERS ;D

HAHAHAA WTF?

tabye

♥

Skins; It's A Lifestyle Choice :)

I'm Cooler Than The Ice Caps At The Antartic ;D

2010-06-05T17:30:00.002+01:00

Hello crusaders of the cyberworld.

Guess what?

Happy Holidays BABES :)

Give life a rest ; You can NEVER get enough of it :)

-BaizuraYusof-

2010

tabye

♥

Still Undecided

2010-06-05T17:12:00.003+01:00

Dear Allah, can you please PLEASE help me make my decision for my future. I'M LOST.

"I wanna be a rockstar, a superhero, living the dream, doing things that I've always wanted. I wanna see my face on the TV with my picture on the cover, for my friends to see a different side of me"

-A Different Side of Me by Allstar Weekend-

♥

tired and emotionally bruised.

tabye

♥

Doctors, Am I Dead?

2010-06-04T07:13:00.002+01:00

Hey you. Today was WHAT. HAHA. Yeah. 20 people didn't come to school today. So it was just me, Izzah, Sharmeen, Amirah and Vaishnevi. Well Aisha came but then she went off with Pn. Chris. LOL. So we just put in the marks for Physics PEKA and Agama. WEE. So...

I wished for a good day without you, although somehow you still come around and surprised me

-BaizuraYusof-

2010

Current OBSESSION: SCRUBS :)

Dr. Dorian ♥

and

Dr. Drew Suffin :D

tabye

♥

We're The Creme de la Creme :D

2010-06-03T15:45:00.006+01:00

Dear Mental :)

Find Friends For Fun Friendships :)

♥

-BaizuraYusof-

2010

Goodday! HAHA. :) Another post before I go to bed.

3 WEEKS of TORTURING MID TERMS have drained me and my friends.

FORM 5 MID TERMS

DONE.

AND.

OVER.

WITH.

ALHAMDULILLAH!!!!

So off to a good start with THAT obstacle in our Senior Year. Scratch that away from our 'MISERY HIGHLIGHTS' corner. Now it's time to REJUVENATE OURSELVES!!

Mid Term Hols ; Surprise me with your unpredictable wonders :)

tabye

♥

Halfway There and Changing FONTS!

2010-06-03T10:43:00.008+01:00

Life is too short to not take a chance on anything

-BaizuraYusof-

2010

Hey there! It's been exactly a MONTH since I've been blogging! :) So HERE I AM! Haha. Yes. Trying to look at things the OTHER way around yeah? HAHA. New ambitions! I am using a new font. And I've been listening to more MELLOW-ER songs. Not that It's a BAD thing, but I've been toning it down a little. Well thanks to the ABSENCE OF MCFLY. I can't wait for them! A teen needs MUSIC!

Damn. HAHA. Time flew by just like that huh? It's FREAKING JUNE! LOL. Having tons of things going on during the MID TERM BREAK! :) So much for getting my SLEEP ON. -.- Have to do:

a) Add Maths Folio

b) Chemistry Worksheets

c) Add Maths Form 4 Workbook

d) Nirmala CRASHCOURSE.

e) OUTING WITH MY LOVELYS :)

f) REORGANISING my ROOM!

Okay. Shall look at it this way, I DON'T HAVE MUCH TO DO. Actually THIS IS WHAT I ONLY NEED TO DO!

a) Add Maths Folio

b) Add Maths Form 4 work

c) Chemistry Worksheets

Okay okay! I may have been A TAD BIT melodramatic! Or am I? ;p HAHA. So I guess that sums up my intro to my BLOGGING COMEBACK! Shall get back to you with more info!

tabye

♥

Goodbye, Baby

2010-04-26T10:24:00.003+01:00

Goodbye, baby... I'll miss you

♥

BABY

I'm missing you already

it's sad that we have no words to spare

tears in my eyes they mean nothing to you

if only you understand.

tabye

♥

I Feel Stupid..

2010-04-21T12:11:00.002+01:00

Hey. Yeah. Today was.. a drag.. well kinda.. it was OKAY. But only felt devastating when i couldn't answer a simple VECTOR question -.- gosh. I NEED HELP!

Why me?

why am i the one whose suffering?

Allah.. please INCREASE MY INTELLIGENCE :/

tabye

♥

Give Me A Bucket I Wanna Throw Up

2010-04-21T11:51:00.002+01:00

waiting for dinner.

If i were the kid who ate crayons during my childhood, this will be my

VOMIT!

i have a case of;

CRAYONILISIS!

HARHAR.

I've gotten LAME-er than USUAL.

♥

heal me before i hurt myself again

tabye

OHYEAH

I'm getting high on CHEESE!

I'm Not Perfect, But Maybe Perfect Enough For You

2010-04-20T08:11:00.001+01:00

Dear YOU ♥ ,

I hope you're fine.

I'm okay.

My heart it pounds, yeah YOU got me.

oh WTH Ke$ha -.-

♥

I'm a mess in dress (;

tabye

♥