I Have A Lot On My Plate Now

Dear Mental,

I have been thinking about my future, I am somewhat EXCITED and I just wanna know how it'll feel like to be in uni!

HAHA, well, I guess I would have to gear myself up first.

I am SO NOT READY for uni life yet.

HECK, I am still going to be in college actually!

AHAHA, oh yeah, did I mention that I will be going for Foundation In Architecture in Cambridge Ruskin International College first :)

After 2 terms of that, then next year in 2012 only I will attend my degree of BSc(Hons) Architecture in Anglia Ruskin University, Chelmsford!

Oh and another tid bit info, Joshua's dad is from Anglia Ruskin! HAHA, AWESOME! But he studied law :) DAMNN.

HAHA, Joshua kinda showed me some of his photos in Chelmsford :D So I am pretty much loving it! But I am yet to experience the way of living in Chelmsford!

But I reckon it's pretty nice and just right for me. I like small towns. They're adorable. In a really odd way!

It's like Greenwich! However, Joshua said that Greenwich is like TOWN TOWN while Chelmsford is like a suburb -,- HEH? HAHA, sadly I can't really tell the difference!

Gosh, okay. EPIC FAIL. This is how bad my ADD is! I was suppose to work on my British Culture Essay but sadly, I am here blogging! HAHA, it's okay! Nowadays, these are only times that I can actually blog for real! :) Without feeling weird because there's nothing to talk about, so yeah. That's pretty much my life now.

Oh, and I think I really need a therapist. Or maybe I just need to see eye candy. HAHA, I need to have a crush again. My taste of guys is beginning to fizzle out. And that ain't good! HAHA. Need to keep on a look out for some fish!

Alright then, enough for me. Shall get back to my whatsoever British Culture Essay -_-

tabye

♥

Am I Ready For The Future?

Dear Mental,

I have 2 weeks left of college, and that is so overwhelming yet surreal.

I am glad that I have survived it so far.

I still can't believe that I spent 90% of my life this year in London.

It still haven't sunken in to me yet.

HAHA. Well, that's just my way of saying, "SOMEBODY JUST PINCH ME! THIS ALL MUST BE A GODDAMN DREAM RIGHT?!"

As per usual, my melodramatic personality is beginning to creep out of me! Which I think ain't a good thing. But, I love drama, so be it.

Speaking of drama, after the long wait, I have been given an unconditional offer to CRIC/ARU for Foundation in Architecture and Bsc(Hons) Architecture! YAY me. Alhamdulillah.

This will totally never happened without my parents, friends, teachers, god and of course myself! HAHA.

But yeah! Nevertheless, I am still bummed that my campus ain't the Cambridge campus. Instead I got the Chelmsford campus! But I like it! HAHA, I HOPE I WILL.

At the end of the term after our exams, Joshua is nice enough to allow me to tag along with him back to his dad's house in Chelmsford, Essex!

Another good thing about Chelmsford, it's just 30++mins to London by train! WOOT. AHAHAH. and it's a nice quiet town! Hopefully it's like Greenwich :D

Oh and another BIG INFO, Harry Judd is from Chelmsford ^.^ and they always carry out the V Festival there! YAY. So, I have a feeling or more like I know my best friends will flip when they know that I got the Chelmsford campus :)

So far so good. :) Can't wait to accept the offer. Just waiting for mama and Kak Nia to sent me the important details in order for me to apply for accommodation as well!

Uni, I think I am ready?

Allah, what do you think?

Okay, get back to me later, ASAP okay? HAHA.

tabye

♥

You'll Never Find Someone Like Me

I think I know what I want.

Maybe, I don't need it.

Somtimes, something that you want ain't actually exactly your main priority.

Maybe, I just say that I want something/someone just because other people own it.

Maybe, just maybe.

Only time will tell if this feeling will fade or whatever need that I want might just be fulfilled in the near future.

I guess so.

tabye

♥

Moving On

Dear Mental, it's been FOREVER since I blogged. Well, looked what happen?

Last term's in already and Summer has started :)

What a nice way to finish up life in Bellerbys. :) Although, the 'saying goodbye' part ain't much of a good thing. SIGHS. A few weeks ago I had to say goodbye to my awesome seniors and friends who finished their last term already. It was hard saying goodbye, I know that we would still be able to see each other when we come back to London in September for uni. Insyaallah :)

Speaking of unis, I for one am desperate in need for a place in a university. I have been rejected by 3 of my UCAS choices already, not to be over confident, but I didn't know that I would be at this state by July, -__-

Sighs, nevertheless, I am not giving up. Life's too short to just let everything go. I am still holding, or more like BARELY holding on. HAHA, So yeah, life has been very overwhelming these past couple of days. I would be lying if I said that college was easy. It's real life I tell you. It's just ready to get your guard down if you don't be careful.

Basically, what I've learned so far in Bellerbys is that:

I HAVE TO FOLLOW MY GUT PLEASE :)

And pray a lot :) HEE. So yeah. With a little bit of help from myself, Allah, family and friends, I am not surprised that I am still surviving in London :)

Okay dokay, since I have only a few hours left to move out from my old room to my new one, I should get going! :) Will update soon about my 'new' room. :)

tabye

♥

Guiding Myself Through Life

Hey Mental! I am so sorry I have left you for about two months or so without any update about my new current life in London.
Yes, I am at last in London! :) It's like a dream come true. Haha. Oh well, it's already February and lots have happened!
I am currently starting my half term break tomorrow! YAY.
Haha, so really excited to have some break after working hard for the past month and a half.
I made quite a number of new friends and they're really nice :)
At least they're there to make me feel less homesick. :) I miss my friends back at home as well though :(
Alhamdulillah for the Internet :D HAHA.
Oh, I went to Maroon 5's gig last week by the way. It was DAMN awesome. I went for it with AJ, Nav and John, plus some other students from our college.
It was cool that the opening act was Sara Bareilles! She sings very well live! I salute her :')
Maroon 5 was obviously awesome! It was worth waiting for! And also worth £25! HAHA.
Luckily mama didn't flip when she found out that I went to see them!
She was just glad that I came back safely and in one piece :D
Well, so far so good. I am currently taking 3 subjects for this term:
a) Art b) English and an extra subject which is c) Business Maths
I got 64% PHEW. That's okay right? I mean , I missed 5 chapters damn it -__- HAHA, I am REALLY RUSTY, hence the marks.
Oh and plus, I suck at Business Arithmetic and I made TONS of SILLY MISTAKES according to Mr. Aslan :/ SIGHS.
But hey, guess what? John is going to be my tutor for FREE! :) Thanks John Lam :D
So, I really owe him :)
Not only that, I will be applying for AA with Emily and Fatima! WOOT.
EXCITED. Insyaallah I'll get in :)
My dream would be fulfilled to be in the best architecture school in London!
Okay, will stop here for now.
Loads more to tell!
Shall not cram everything in one post :)

tabye

♥

Disaster? I Guess?

Dear Mental,

What's going on with the boys in bands? :O

I mean, Sash's LOVE, Dan Flint just got himself BLONDE hair like a few weeks ago!

And now guess what,

MARTIN BENNETT JOHNSON

turned

BLONDE HEADED

as well

-_____-

oh god.

I'm still TRYING.. or more like BARELY holding onto my seat when I saw his pics!

GAH

WHY MARTIN? WHY?

tabye

♥

Just Don't Panic

Dear Mental,
It's been a WEEK since WE talked.
Is it me or maybe we're just not going to see each other anymore?
I know that I'm making it a big deal, but I never thought of it as a bad thing until a few people actually pointed it out.
"Why didn't you try calling and go out?" "Didn't you try texting?"
After those questions were asked, finally I realised there was like somewhat rather a 'HOLE' in my chest *As quoted by Bella Swan from The Twilight Saga*
So, I'm guessing, I feel empty when you're not around?
Why do I even feel this way about you?
GEEZ.
I'd have to admit, having you around was much more, happy? or gleeful?
Oh god. More like I just feel like I don't want you to go away from my sight.
Mother told me, at some point, these were those feelings which I rarely get unless I met someone like you.
YaAllah? Really?
WHY. OH.WHY.
To be honest, you were the FIRST person who actually made me feel this way so badly.
Let's just hope, you're not just another useless bad memory that will be remembered.
I want you to be an unforgettable memory which I would keep wanting to repeat like a photographic memory in my mind.
You were the one who started this scene, so let's not just let the unsaid scripts left hanging.
Maybe,just maybe, one day you'll come back into the picture and add a beautiful caption to it for both of us to remember forever.
Let me remind you, I'll be leaving.
So, if you have anything to say to me, just say it before I leave.
You have 15 DAYS.

'Cause you can't avoid me now, you'll be just fine without me, tell me the stories when I get home.

tabye

♥